kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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