Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
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