Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
What a fucking waste of an outfit
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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