idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
