We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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