her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
