U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize
