she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
