when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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