I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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