names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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