Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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