My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Randomize
