im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
