Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize