Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Found the puke drawer
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
