between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
