After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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