Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
