i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
