we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize