I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
