It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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