So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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