does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
How external is "for external use only"?
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
