Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
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