And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
