I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
