so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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