so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
