i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize
