Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Randomize
