Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
You should frame my arrest warrant.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
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