Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
