Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
