Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
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