Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Randomize
