You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
