Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
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