my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
