ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I will pee on everything he values.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Randomize
