Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
The struggles of a small town man whore
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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