This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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