haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
New York to be Host to Americaâ€™s Biggest Singles Event
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Kylie Jenner Wasnâ€™t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911