Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
they're like a gay fantastic four
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Randomize
