I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
