I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex