haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
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You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
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