I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks