You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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